As I flee to the few shadows remaining the our sunny garden, I realize that a lot have changed, without leaving any visible marks on the surface of my daily life. I still have a lot of self-hatred to battle when I look in the mirror, but a more stable confidence is building up, so far so good.
Yesterday My beloved sister Jackie came down from London to visit and I had the possibility to show my southern coast town/city off, and I was through her eyes I realized that I actually do love this place more the I thought. I know that I don't want to move north, despite a few attractive job offers, because after 2 years, Im really starting to own the place and build a proper home base, not just the physical home, but also build a feeling of home in whole place.
My perception have changed in many ways, I can not see certain darker shadows in my own mind, identify them and take action to transform. The process can be slow, but one you just wake up and realize that you have changed. I have nothing planned for today, Im sitting in the garden, (within reach of WiFi, naturally) and just busy feeling the earth beneath my feet, and while my life at this moment is not perfect, at this moment I can truly say that I feel happiness...who would have thought that of me 2 years ago in Denmark. :)
We have a coffee cat :)
Summer on the south coast :)
